In Which I Have a Confession of Sorts

I am a hoarder of ideas. I have an external hard drive that can hold a TB of data. It is over half full of podcasts that I subscribed to at some point but have never actually listened to. 500 effing gigabytes, mostly of people talking about mostly outdated technology trends and performances of bands that are probably not “cool” to listen to anymore, or at least will not put me ahead of any music curves. But I can’t bring myself to delete or unsubscribe from them because I am deathly afraid of missing out on something that will change my life. This same hoarding habit is the reason that I have a large collection of actual music in my iTunes library that I have never listened to.

Prime example: I like the Beatles well enough. I am not, however, a die-hard Beatles fan in the least. This did not stop me from downloading THE ENTIRE BEATLES DISCOGRAPHY. This includes doubles on doubles on doubles of songs since I now have the US and UK releases of several albums. But which ones are extraneous? Which ones do I delete? I don’t know!! I also don’t really care!

I spent a good chunk of time a couple of years ago compiling an Excel spreadsheet with several “Best Book” sort of lists. I have some weird random list from TIME Magazine maybe, two columns dedicated to the MLA 100 Best Books Fiction/Non-Fiction lists, and some other column. I have read maybe 12 of these books and that might even be an overestimate. Fun fact: I used to want a career in editing and publishing. Fun Fact #2: Even though I am not a complete idiot, I am actually not that well read! I have never read “The Great Gatsby” *gasp* This book title hoarding behavior has carried over into the audio/visual world as evidenced by my Netflix Instant Queue, which only contains TV Series. My Instant Queue is, more or less, alphabetized and includes any show that I have a passing interest in. For a while I was attempting to tackle my Instant Queue IN ALPHABETICAL ORDER but I got bored with 24 and then I tried to suffer through Ally McBeal but here’s a little thing about that show: ALLY MCBEAL SUCKS. So now, I’m finally watching Parks and Rec which I totally love and am sorry for wasting so much time on Ally McBeal The Worst Show I Have Come In Contact With.

Another fun fact about Netflix and me: I like to be able to log into Netflix and go to “Recently Watched” and continue whatever TV Series I was last watching but my brother has my password and he is ROBSESSED with How I Met Your Mother and watches about 17 episodes of this show a day and I have to scroll way the eff down to get back to my current project Parks and Rec (which is a far better show, duh). This is sort of a non-sequitur but mostly LISTEN UP, INTERNET. MY SUPPOSED-MR.-COOL-GUY BROTHER ACTUALLY DOES NOTHING BUT WATCH HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER AND I GET TO FOOT THE $7-A-MONTH-OR-WHATEVER BILL.

I never thought I had a bucket list but I’m now realizing that I do, and that it looks kind of like this:

1. Read all the things

2. Watch all the things

3. Listen to all the podcasts (?) or maybe: Listen to everything by the Beatles or whatever, you get the idea

So we’re going to go on a little adventure, Internet people, in which I try to consume every type of media out there and then I’m going to record my thoughts about said piece of media and maybe we’ll discover something shocking/enlightening/tragic about myself other than the fact that I like to procrastinate by making lists. I mean, I’ve already ruled out Ally McBeal, so that says something right?

I also have this thing where I One Day Wish To Be A Writer, and I’ve been hoarding some ideas in the ol’ brain notepad so maybe I’ll share some of those too. Get pumped.


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